So Far So Good

January is usually billed by all as the 'Month of Recovery'. Christmas and the New Year celebrations have gone, a lot of money has been spent on food and alcohol and many people feel the need to subscribe to their local gym to work off their quota of turkey, christmas pudding and quality street. Gym memberships, if you're interested, increase 121% in January than in any other time of year. Also 65% of statistics are made up on the spot.

January is a whole different kettle of fish for me though. After what is usually a good Christmas and New Year, with the notable exception of 2010, January is the month when most of my best loved friends go back to their lives being wasters elsewhere in the country and this, mixed with the probable nippy and wet weather, doesn't make a good recipe for my brain. Ever since "this" started, I have never had a good January, as it is always the month where thoughts become more dark and actions become more crazy. I distinctly remember last year, sitting in my car at 3 o'clock in the morning, having just realised that I had no money in my account despite working night shifts for the past 9 months, genuinely considering driving off into the darkness, with nothing whatsoever. Who would care? No one was my answer..

So far though, the 7 and a bit days that 2012 has produced haven't been that bad. I had a bit of a wobble on Thursday, when thoughts multiplied and spiralled but I was forced to walk to town by Mother Mitten and I felt a little bit better later on in the day. Once again, the notion that getting out into the fresh air may seem ridiculous, but it does help. Mother Mitten needs to be thanked on many occasions for just pushing me out the house! Other than that though, days have been filled with reasonable enough happiness, including a rather hot Nando's and a round of golf which was most definitely the opposite...

Cold. If you hadn't already worked that out!

This weekend though has thrown up an interesting variety of activity. Well, maybe not. Friday night was billed as the final night of the Christmas festivities before everyone went back, but it ended earlier than anticipated due to circumstances out of our control! For once, it wasn't my fault, (I hope!), yet the sigh of relief from my bank account was audible, as little money was spent! I woke up at a time more suited to my sleeping habits, where I joined Father Mitten in going to watch a rather fiesty local game before joining Beddoe, Mario and family at the local for a few bevvies and a few games of pool, where experience narrowly beat youth. This time, it was most definitely my fault as I set up Uncle Beddoe with the easiest of final blacks. Never mind! A few failed attempts at the quiz machine, in which our knowledge of random topics was tested to the limit and also a failed return to the fruit machines, (which I have avidly avoided for years!), and it was time to shoot home for dinner.

This is a time of day where I think I have made progress. To most of you reading this, you must be thinking, "How can one improve eating dinner?" No, I am not eating more, but I am treating it as a time I can sit down and feel like part of the family. Just making random conversation, makes you feel better and makes the relationship better. All part of the grand master plan. In the past, I used to grab my plate and make off upstairs, eating on my own, opting for seclusion ahead of company. I am trying to change this, and so far I have largely been successful.

This evening, I have gone back to my old habit of sitting on the laptop, dossing, but I feel that's ok after a day of activity and being out and about and around people. Right now, it is nearest makes no difference, 3am, but that's ok also. I'm awake at 11-12 tomorrow, in time to referee a cup quarter-final and after a probable quiz tomorrow evening, I'll be home by 11 and ready to sleep in time for the weekday slog and the latest of my CBT sessions on monday morning! Progress is slow, but it is certainly being made!

I have an idea for my blog tomorrow, (if I remember), where I will talk you through a game of football from the eyes of a referee. Tomorrow, being a cup quarter final, SHOULD be a good game, so I will attempt to talk you through the thought processes and any major decisions that may crop up. Might interest some people, may bore some others to death, but I want to try and make people understand what it's like to be a football referee. There has been way too much criticism of referees recently, (although, yes, some of it is warranted), but to generalise all referees as, "useless" is going too far in my opinion.

I'm absolutely buzzing for tomorrow's game in fairness, which probably means little sleep for me. But I suppose I'd better give it a go. Night all, and look out for tomorrow!