Alcohol Makes People Act Funny

I was expecting a busy one tonight. Every Saturday night is, but the good weather and the weekend before Bedford's biggest festival means more people are going to be out partying and that ultimately means more customers.

The night started off fairly quietly. Obviously, the Bedford masses were waiting till later to strike and that was certainly the case.

I will start with earlier though. Another win for the mighty Bedford Town, 4 in 4 now means we are 3rd, (to be confirmed), and I hit some very well connected and fluid runs before being caught on the boundary for 33. Hopefully, I can reproduce that form later on today and it is due to be a little cooler and therefore more bearable. We got a very respectable 225 and bowled out our opposition for 173. I bowled atrociously, but luckily our team has more capable beings and we won comfortably in the end.

I always go home after cricket in a bad mood. More so on Saturday and today was no exception. I got home at half 7, just in time for the 3-2 Germany win and my Dad's complaints that the Germans had played none of his dream team picks, "on purpose to spite him". I severely doubt the German manager, Joachim Loaw, (a name with more pleghm than an Afghan), chose his team based on some randomer from England-land and his fantasy team. Dear me. Still, it was a very good game but it was all over too soon and, quicker than I could say Lukas Podolski, I was driving in my beloved Saxo down Haylands Way, listening to Radio 1's god awful Saturday night line-up, in a depressing state. I had to keep telling myself about the money and the holiday next week and that I had to only do 2 more shifts before I get a break. Holidays are so much more valuable now I only get 4 weeks and not 12.

As I said, the shift started fairly slowly. There was some last-minute sortings out to ... sort out.. after the chiller leak but that was all dealt with swimmingly and things were all back to shape after a few days of ... swimming... It all started going tits-up, (almost literally), at about 2.30am.

The Wall was on his break. At least I think he was. For all I know he could of been lying on the ground in a deep state of shock or running around in non-existent traffic, but the point I'm trying to get at is I was out there, on my own. As is the norm on Saturday night, you get a few people come in persuading you to sell them some alcohol, (which you're not allowed to after 11pm), and every time the answer is, no. It happened again tonight. 2, admittedly dazzling girls, (I say "dazzling", they were bloody amazing!), came in and asked if they could have some vodka. I said, no, in a more polite and dignified way but they wouldn't take no for an answer. For about 15 minutes, they tried to bargain and I was getting slightly annoyed. I had things to do and I couldn't be doing with people, however good-looking, badgering me for things they weren't going to get..

..Then they offered to strip. No word of a lie, they offered to strip for some vodka. I thought about it. Which is more important..? My job or ... no! You need money.. I laughed it off and they eventually left, alcohol-less. Strange times. It sort of brightened my mood though.

The Wall then came off his break, (or fit or running around in traffic), and I went on mine. Finally, a chance to sit down and have something to eat. I texted the man who needs a dentist and relaxed. 15 minutes in, half way through, The Wall opens the door ahead of me. "I need your help.."

I was livid. This is my break! How dare he disturb me during my precious break! I went out into the front expecting him to ask me to look for a pair of scissors but I was greeted with a monstrous queue, snaking all the way out the door.. 3am.. Where do all these people come from?! So, I had a 15 minute break, took some people's money, then got back to work. This job is harsh sometimes..

Time went on. Customers, more than usual, came and went. I was struggling to keep up with the jobs and things didn't help when I got my 2nd awkward customer.

It was a man this time. Definitely not as good looking as the pair of ladies and he was visibly ruined. Staggering through BP's mazey queue, he made his way up to the till. He tried many attempts to talk... many.. and after 5 minutes, blurted out "20 Mayfair". This guy did not just waste 5 minutes of my time to say 2 words.. I short-changed him because I was annoyed. I don't care and quite frankly, BP needs all the money they can get at the moment!

The rest of the shift was fairly quiet, as it usually is early on a Sunday morning, and I managed to make up for lost time and get all my jobs done, just, and go home at a reasonable time. My legs ache and I have another cricket match later. Hopefully I can get some runs, with the aid of Pro Plus before my final shift of the week.. I cannot wait for this time tomorrow morning...

The things that alcohol can do to people... You wouldn't find me offering to strip for vodka. That's more Beddoe's territory! ;)

Cya x