Good afternoon from the eastern suburb of Lysterfield in Melbourne. I've been here for 3 days now, trying to acclimatise and settle in. It is as difficult as I predicted, with some up and down moments already to speak of, and I am under no illusions how difficult the next week or two is going to be.
Leading up to Wednesday morning, I was surprisingly not very nervous. I typed out my last post with the thinking that I might not actually need it, (that turned out to be false), and the nerves only hit when my Dad left me at Heathrow Airport at roughly 7am, giving me one last hug before I walked through to departures. Sitting there, I was in high spirits. I was about to leave on the adventure of a lifetime. What was there to be nervous about? When I finally made it on board my first flight, EY012 to Abu Dhabi, I was excited. My one and only time on a plane was 12 years ago, and I couldn't remember what the take off was like. It wasn't even much of an anti-climax either as I officially left English tarmac and high into the air. However, that was where the magic ended. The flight wasn't great, with Etihad Airways not offering much in the way of leg room. I was sitting next to the window, with a Japanese woman knocked out on sleeping pills next to me, so it was quite hard to get her to budge so I could walk around. For 7 hours, I was cramped in a small space with only the in-flight "E-Box" to keep me entertained. 'After Earth' was the only good film they had. I couldn't put up with much more than 10 minutes of 'The Internship'.
Disembarking at Abu Dhabi International Airport then was a blessing, with legs aching and pins and needles setting in, I needed a major walk around. I was already way further than I had ever been before, all on my own and with next to no experience of how airports actually worked, I basically followed two people who I had overheard were also going to Melbourne. Walking through security, I was tired and a little agitated, especially after I threw all my belongings in one of those trays, walked through the detectors, and to the other side, to find my iPod had somehow vanished. Great.
The three-hour wait was okay as I was able to jump on the internet and chat to a few people from home. Soon though it was time to start the 2nd leg of the journey. Which was quite possibly the worst 14 hours of my life. I was sat in an aisle seat this time, so it would be easier to get up and walk around, but whilst being packed in like sardines, the flight just went on and on and on and on... I had purchased some sleeping pills from Heathrow, and in a last-ditch attempt to try and make the time disappear, downed a couple and felt myself sink into the rather uncomfortable chair I had been provided with...
Waking up, I could see the sun bursting through the small crack in the window that the Australian lady sitting next to me had left whilst pulling the blind across. It had worked. The sleeping pills had done their job, as I had gone to sleep with 11 hours of the flight still remaining. Logging in to the E-Box in front of me, I was hoping to see that there was a couple of hours remaining and I would be there.
Clicking on 'Flight Path' with my heart jumping out my chest, I watched the loading bar get to 100% before the time remaining section flashed up.
8 hours 20 minutes remain. You have got to be kidding me.
Landing in Melbourne then was something I thought was never going to happen. I was firmly convinced I was going to be in the air forever. But when the plane did eventually land, I was extremely tired. Tired and very nervous. I had been speaking to the two guys who were due to pick me up from the airport, but it suddenly dawned on me that I was about to meet them. What do I say? What do I do?
This was when the irrational side of me kicked in. I suddenly found myself in the back seat of the car, driving past the city of Melbourne on the way to my new home for the next six months. Apparently, a lot of the players from the club I'm playing for were waiting for me in the clubhouse. Upon arrival, my heart rate was through the roof and walking in through the front door to find 30 faces looking in my direction made me feel a bit like a celebrity. There was a moment of silence before something inside me said, "Ice Breaker... Ice Breaker..."
"F**k me, someone get me a beer!"
I don't even drink a lot of beer. A few laughs circled the room as I went round shaking people's hands. I might have come across as someone who was uber-confident, but inside I was absolutely shaking. Someone then tapped me on the shoulder and gave me a can. Of Jack Daniels and Coke. Bliss. It was just what I needed. I had about 4 or 5 cans, becoming naturally more and more sociable after each one, with someone even offering a night out in the city. It was tempting, but even I wasn't going to stretch that far, as we made our way to my abode for the next 6 months.
This house is unbelievable. Its very common for houses in Australia to be big, and this one is no different, with a large garden and a pool. I have my own room on one side of the house, with a size about 4 times as big as my own room at home and a very comfortable double bed that came in handy as I crashed upon getting in from the introductions at the clubhouse.
Since then, I've been fighting. Fighting with my own insecurities to get settled in and feel comfortable. I constantly walk around, struggling to find things to do and I feel very quiet and reserved. Anxiety and jetlag are not a good combination. The only time I felt at least a little bit at ease was yesterday, during AFL Grand Final Day. A huge day in the Aussie sporting calendar, the grand final of the premier Aussie Rules competition brings Australia together. These guys start drinking at midday and carry on until they can't pack any more away. Despite tiredness, I got involved and bought a crate of cans (JD and coke cans - of course), and it was a good day. I eventually got the hang of the rules after the 1st quarter, and backed the underdogs, Fremantle, (affectionately known as 'Freo' by the Aussies who have a habit of shortening everything!), but they ultimately lost. Not that it mattered. It was a good day of socialising, with me, making sure not to go overboard on the alcohol, merely laughing at a few of the others, who did.
I got home at roughly midnight and crashed in my bed again, but it was only a couple of hours before I was completely awake. A sudden feeling of fear had washed over me, and an irrational thought process began in where I contemplated why I was out here. It was a rough time last night, about 5 hours of negative thinking and battling the demons. I was expecting them, but nothing can quite prepare you for the strength of the thoughts. I can imagine these thoughts will come and go within the next couple of weeks. And its not going to be nice. The main problem is the Aussie sense of humour. They like to crack a joke, "take the piss" and "banter". Its all they do, and for someone who is new to the situation, its hard to know when they are being serious. There was a moment during Friday when I laughed at what I thought was a joke and it wasn't. Frankly, I'm bordering on being a nervous wreck.
I just have to keep reminding myself that things are going to get better. My first training session is on Tuesday, followed by a probable indoor game on Wednesday, another training session on Thursday and the first league game on Saturday. Hopefully, I can immerse myself fully in these activities and all of a sudden, I'll be well on my way.
But right at this moment, I am struggling. I was always going to wasn't I...
Sunday 29 September 2013
Monday 23 September 2013
Motivational Speaking
This post might come across as a bit stupid. However, I shall type it out for use in the next couple of weeks. I am excited about Australia, but it is guaranteed that there will be a stage where anxiety and/or homesickness threatens to get the better of me in the initial stages I am in Melbourne. So this post is for me!
...
Yo Mitten. It's Mitten. Bedford Mitten. The Mitten excited about Australia. You know when you typed this out, (last Sunday after the pub quiz where you burnt your mouth on a vegetable samosa), but you might just be needing a little reminder of what you're missing out on in B-Town. Here goes.
- In England, its Winter. It's fucking cold, and if you were in England, you'd have nothing to do. You know exactly what Winter does to you, don't you... Any feelings of homesickness or anxiety that you're feeling right now simply cannot match up to those feelings you experienced last Winter. You know that.
- There's no cricket in England. Sure, there's the indoor league, but that's early on a Sunday morning, and you don't want to be getting up early on a freezing Sunday morning to go and play cricket inside, right?
- People are jealous of you. Everyone said it before you left. "I wish I was you, going to Australia" ... "Can you put me in your suitcase too?", (I don't think there's a euphemism there!) You don't want people to ask questions if you come home after one or two weeks. That would be embarrassing.
- Can you imagine being at work in the lead up to Christmas with the shit you'd be dealing with that I mentioned in point 1? It'd be horrible. Just like it always is.
- As your sister said, if you ever feel down and out, just step outside and feel the Australian sun on your face. And then think about the cold in Bedford. Which is better?
- A reason to stay in Melbourne is the Boxing Day Test Match. Seriously, that's iconic. You will never get the opportunity to see an Ashes Boxing Day Test Match ever again. Certainly not for free!
- GIVE IT A CHANCE! If your brief uni experience taught you anything, you should know that things will settle down. You will find a job and you will be fine. I promise you. Just imagine the feeling of achievement when you score a ton in Australia. How awesome will that be... It doesn't get much better...
- You don't have to stay out here. I know everyone is saying, "You'll love it so much, you'll want to stay", but that is not up to them. It is up to you.
Remember this. This experience is pretty much FREE. You are being paid to go out there, to do what you love doing. This really is a once-in-a-lifetime experience. You don't want to look back on this in 20 years time, when you're paying a mortgage, and think, "I wish I'd stuck it out".
Be yourself. Don't feel the need to appease your Australian team-mates by being more "blokey" or anything similar. They will expect you to take time to settle in. Do what YOU are most comfortable with.
And if the worst comes to the worst, and this little attempt at motivation hasn't helped one bit, just stick it out. Life is testing sometimes, but as the old adage goes, things do get better. You know this too.
Please please please stick it out.
You get to come home in March. 6 months is not a long time in the grand scheme of things. Once the cricket season starts, you'll be fine and dandy.
The human brain is designed to fall back on the easy option. As someone said to you last week, the "status quo". This is an adventure doing what you love doing.
ENJOY IT!
Mitten. Good luck. From the Mitten in the status quo.
...
Yo Mitten. It's Mitten. Bedford Mitten. The Mitten excited about Australia. You know when you typed this out, (last Sunday after the pub quiz where you burnt your mouth on a vegetable samosa), but you might just be needing a little reminder of what you're missing out on in B-Town. Here goes.
- In England, its Winter. It's fucking cold, and if you were in England, you'd have nothing to do. You know exactly what Winter does to you, don't you... Any feelings of homesickness or anxiety that you're feeling right now simply cannot match up to those feelings you experienced last Winter. You know that.
- There's no cricket in England. Sure, there's the indoor league, but that's early on a Sunday morning, and you don't want to be getting up early on a freezing Sunday morning to go and play cricket inside, right?
- People are jealous of you. Everyone said it before you left. "I wish I was you, going to Australia" ... "Can you put me in your suitcase too?", (I don't think there's a euphemism there!) You don't want people to ask questions if you come home after one or two weeks. That would be embarrassing.
- Can you imagine being at work in the lead up to Christmas with the shit you'd be dealing with that I mentioned in point 1? It'd be horrible. Just like it always is.
- As your sister said, if you ever feel down and out, just step outside and feel the Australian sun on your face. And then think about the cold in Bedford. Which is better?
- A reason to stay in Melbourne is the Boxing Day Test Match. Seriously, that's iconic. You will never get the opportunity to see an Ashes Boxing Day Test Match ever again. Certainly not for free!
- GIVE IT A CHANCE! If your brief uni experience taught you anything, you should know that things will settle down. You will find a job and you will be fine. I promise you. Just imagine the feeling of achievement when you score a ton in Australia. How awesome will that be... It doesn't get much better...
- You don't have to stay out here. I know everyone is saying, "You'll love it so much, you'll want to stay", but that is not up to them. It is up to you.
Remember this. This experience is pretty much FREE. You are being paid to go out there, to do what you love doing. This really is a once-in-a-lifetime experience. You don't want to look back on this in 20 years time, when you're paying a mortgage, and think, "I wish I'd stuck it out".
Be yourself. Don't feel the need to appease your Australian team-mates by being more "blokey" or anything similar. They will expect you to take time to settle in. Do what YOU are most comfortable with.
And if the worst comes to the worst, and this little attempt at motivation hasn't helped one bit, just stick it out. Life is testing sometimes, but as the old adage goes, things do get better. You know this too.
Please please please stick it out.
You get to come home in March. 6 months is not a long time in the grand scheme of things. Once the cricket season starts, you'll be fine and dandy.
The human brain is designed to fall back on the easy option. As someone said to you last week, the "status quo". This is an adventure doing what you love doing.
ENJOY IT!
Mitten. Good luck. From the Mitten in the status quo.
Tuesday 17 September 2013
The Countdown
It still hasn't sunk in yet. I can't get my head around living on the other side of the world for six months, in BLOODY AUSTRALIA!
This isn't going to be a big post. Just an update really. For, if I begin ranting, I will merely talk about how I expect to have a tough first couple of weeks but am hopeful it will work out. Lets just wing it right? I have everything I need. Aussie dollars in abundance, a suitcase (might be useful), could do with a few more summer clothes yes and a credit card. Oh yes, I have a credit card. Only to be used in "emergencies" ... We'll say no more on that one.
But I'm not nervous. Not yet anyway.
I've just got back from Wales, where I spent a weekend watching England beat Australia at cricket in the sun. In between two days of absolutely horrendous weather. That was a lucky break. This was after getting in at 2.30am on Saturday morning from the aftermath of what was a pretty eventful Bedford CC Awards Evening. It started at 6:45, and the actual award-giving didn't start until about 8:15. In that hour and a half, I'd had a bit of Jack Daniels, but then I realised I actually had to head up the prize-giving. I think its safe to say it didn't go swimmingly! But never mind... I won the Best Batsman Award, (which was voted for by the players!) which was a nice touch. I was leading run-scorer at the club with 903, and after my abysmal start to the season, which left me with an average of 1.5 by the end of May, I reckon that wasn't too bad!
 |
| Bedford CC Best Batsman 2013. I scored 903 runs with an average of 32.25. Not bad considering I'd scored a whole 7 runs by the end of May! |
My final week at work begins tomorrow... With this Australian adventure coming round awfully fast, I have a feeling this week might take a while to complete...
Sunday 8 September 2013
Stay Grounded
"I'm trying to stay as calm as possible and focus one day at a time, but when reality sets in, I feel everything: anxiety, excitement, nerves, pressure and joy."
Apologies for an apparent silence. Just... Everything is Australia at the moment.
I've been pretty quiet on here, in an attempt to play down the Australian trip. I have figured that the more I think about it, the more scenarios I can create in my head, and logic dictates that not all of them will be positive. At cricket the other day, I had to walk out the changing room as the topic randomly changed to deadly spiders in the middle of the tea break. I swiftly change the subject whenever the word 'Australia' pops up at work, and I find myself doing that with alarming regularity. It is true though. It is pretty difficult to escape.
However much I try, I cannot get it out my head. True, some might be asking, "Why would you even want to?", but I have delusions of grandeur when it comes to landing in Melbourne. I imagine myself stepping off the plane into the crescendo of heat and I'm the most confident person on the planet, but its not going to be the case. After the (very) brief honeymoon period, I am going to be terrified. This is a fact. I have yet to fully accept this, much like how I have yet to fully accept I am going at all, and quite frankly, I am going to need every little ounce of willpower I have to get through that initial period. As silly as it sounds, there is a real possibility that I might come home within a couple of weeks. Let's not beat about the bush here. This might happen. I hope it doesn't. But it might.
And the idea of that scares me also. The idea that the thoughts of what it might be like may well probably be completely different to what its actually going to be like. That's unimaginably scary... The thought that I might well end up throwing away the most perfect of opportunities because I panic. It is easy just thinking about it, but actually DOING it will probably be a different challenge altogether.
Right here right now however, I have a more immediate problem. Its safe to say that I like a drink every now and then, (when the weekend comes around!), and it is quite amazing how much I can get through on your average weekend. Barring bank holidays, (where one tends to go out on Friday and Sunday), I worked out yesterday that my last Saturday night in was way back in April. More often than not, I have backed that up with a night out on Friday aswell and every single time I go out, I drink most of a bottle of Jack Daniels before leaving for town where I consume even more. This weekend, I really did push the boundaries of how much I can drink on a night out. I went out on Friday and eventually went to sleep at 6:40am, and yes, you've guessed it already... I had work in the morning. 2 whole hours later, I was in my office physically falling apart at the seams.
And yes, I also went out last night. As if it needed saying. Despite illness, a headache, sore throat and the rest of man-flu like symptoms, I "manned up" and got on with it. Seeing off the majority of a small bottle of Jack Daniels and a few shots followed by what some people call a "session". Now, usually, I wouldn't bother about thinking about the effects of heavy drinking, but last night was the first time I actually stopped and thought about what the hell my liver is going through.
I can feel it right now, physically disintegrating.
And what's more, people are starting to judge me for it. I can feel the words of, "What an idiot, wasting his money like that", and I'd like to say they don't effect me. They don't really, but at the same time I'm not saying, "Don't care what you think!"
One more thing. I think I'm getting a bit ... Arrogant. Big-headed. I can feel myself walking along the streets thinking that I'm better than some other people. That's wrong isn't it? Why am I thinking that?
Oh. Australia. Of course.
Apologies for an apparent silence. Just... Everything is Australia at the moment.
I've been pretty quiet on here, in an attempt to play down the Australian trip. I have figured that the more I think about it, the more scenarios I can create in my head, and logic dictates that not all of them will be positive. At cricket the other day, I had to walk out the changing room as the topic randomly changed to deadly spiders in the middle of the tea break. I swiftly change the subject whenever the word 'Australia' pops up at work, and I find myself doing that with alarming regularity. It is true though. It is pretty difficult to escape.
However much I try, I cannot get it out my head. True, some might be asking, "Why would you even want to?", but I have delusions of grandeur when it comes to landing in Melbourne. I imagine myself stepping off the plane into the crescendo of heat and I'm the most confident person on the planet, but its not going to be the case. After the (very) brief honeymoon period, I am going to be terrified. This is a fact. I have yet to fully accept this, much like how I have yet to fully accept I am going at all, and quite frankly, I am going to need every little ounce of willpower I have to get through that initial period. As silly as it sounds, there is a real possibility that I might come home within a couple of weeks. Let's not beat about the bush here. This might happen. I hope it doesn't. But it might.
And the idea of that scares me also. The idea that the thoughts of what it might be like may well probably be completely different to what its actually going to be like. That's unimaginably scary... The thought that I might well end up throwing away the most perfect of opportunities because I panic. It is easy just thinking about it, but actually DOING it will probably be a different challenge altogether.
Right here right now however, I have a more immediate problem. Its safe to say that I like a drink every now and then, (when the weekend comes around!), and it is quite amazing how much I can get through on your average weekend. Barring bank holidays, (where one tends to go out on Friday and Sunday), I worked out yesterday that my last Saturday night in was way back in April. More often than not, I have backed that up with a night out on Friday aswell and every single time I go out, I drink most of a bottle of Jack Daniels before leaving for town where I consume even more. This weekend, I really did push the boundaries of how much I can drink on a night out. I went out on Friday and eventually went to sleep at 6:40am, and yes, you've guessed it already... I had work in the morning. 2 whole hours later, I was in my office physically falling apart at the seams.
And yes, I also went out last night. As if it needed saying. Despite illness, a headache, sore throat and the rest of man-flu like symptoms, I "manned up" and got on with it. Seeing off the majority of a small bottle of Jack Daniels and a few shots followed by what some people call a "session". Now, usually, I wouldn't bother about thinking about the effects of heavy drinking, but last night was the first time I actually stopped and thought about what the hell my liver is going through.
I can feel it right now, physically disintegrating.
And what's more, people are starting to judge me for it. I can feel the words of, "What an idiot, wasting his money like that", and I'd like to say they don't effect me. They don't really, but at the same time I'm not saying, "Don't care what you think!"
One more thing. I think I'm getting a bit ... Arrogant. Big-headed. I can feel myself walking along the streets thinking that I'm better than some other people. That's wrong isn't it? Why am I thinking that?
Oh. Australia. Of course.
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