Last night should have been the Grand Final of one of the most competitive years in recent times, featuring a good 15 songs that I absolutely adored. However, the coronavirus stole the contest and we were treated* to a replacement tribute show instead.
So, to replace my annual review of the contest, I have decided to rank every winner from number 63 to number 1, a sign of absolute madness or absolute boredom. You decide.
Rather typically for a boy of my generation, I think a lot of the older songs will be lower down the list considering the time difference, so I apologise in advance for what may be some travesties.
And considering it's a day late, I'm going to whizz through them and hope you don't spot the mistakes that will surely be incoming. And don't argue if you disagree, because you surely will. It's what makes Eurovision almost unique!
So without further ado... (*questionably)
...
#63: Rock Me by Riva for Yugoslavia 1989
#62: Tom Pillibi by Jacqueline Boyer for France 1960
#61: Everybody by Dave Benton and 2XL for Estonia 2001
Why this song needed three people to sing it, I shall never know, and none of them would look out of place in a DJ booth at the back of your local Slug and Lettuce.
#60: The Voice by Eimear Quinn for Ireland 1996
#59: A-Ba-Ni-Bi by Izhar Cohen and the Alphabeta for Israel 1978
#58: Amar Pelos Dois by Salvadore Sobral for Portugal 2017
Sorry, I just don't get the love. Salvasnooze...
#57: Net Als Toen by Corry Brokken for Netherlands 1957
#56: Non ho l'eta by Gigiola Cinquetti for Italy 1964
#55: Si la vie est cadeau by Corinne Hermes for Luxembourg 1983
#54: Fengad av en Stormvind by Carola for Sweden 1991
#53: Hard Rock Hallelujah by Lordi for Finland 2006
Props for bringing something new and different to Eurovision but screaming doesn't do it for me. Although two years later, they tried the hard rock route again and I rather liked it so, ignore me.
#52: Dors, mon amour by Andre Claveau for France 1958
Robbed the song commonly known as 'Volare' that wasn't called 'Volare' to victoire...
#51: Every entrant from 1969 (Lulu, Salome, Lenny Kuhr and Frida Boccara)
Honestly? Just to get 1969 out of the way. What a palava...
#50: Nous les Amoreux by Jean-Claude Pascual for Luxembourg 1961
#49: Puppet on a String by Sandie Shaw for United Kingdom 1967
#48: Believe by Dima Bilan for Russia 2008
Cringe...
#47: L'oiseau et l'enfant by Marie Myriam for France 1977
#46: Ein Bisschen Frieden by Nicole for Germany 1982
#45: Apres toi by Vicky Leandros for Luxembourg 1972
#44: Dansevise by Grethe and Jorgann Ingmann for Denmark 1963
#43: Refrain by Lys Assia for Switzerland 1956
Sorry...
#42: Love Shine A Light by Katrina and the Waves for United Kingdom 1997
Sorry again...
#41: Een Beetje by Teddy Scholten for Netherlands 1959
#40: Ding-a-Dong by Teach-In for Netherlands 1975
#39: In Your Eyes by Niamh Kavanagh for Ireland 1993
#38: Un Premier Amour by Isabelle Aubret for France 1962
#37: La La La by Massiel for Spain 1968
Catchy? Yes. Completely unimaginative and undeserving of a Eurovision title? Also yes.
#36: Tu te Reconnaitras by Anne-Marie David for Luxembourg 1973
#35: Merci, Cherie by Udo Jurgens for Austria 1966
#34: Rock and Roll Kids by Paul Harrington and Charlie McGettigan for Ireland 1994
#33: I Wanna by Marie N for Latvia 2002
#32: Toy by Netta for Israel 2018
#31: All Kinds of Everything by Dana for Ireland 1970
#30: Waterloo by ABBA for Sweden 1974
Now, this was voted as the UK's favourite ever Eurovision entry of all time last night, but ever since I was forced to sit through a 4 hour show of a tribute band at the Princess Theatre in Torquay in 2004, I have always had bad flashbacks whenever an ABBA song appears... So... Sorry. Not sorry.
Only as high as 30 because it's a staple of the Eurovision Song Contest...
#29 Un banc, Un arbre, Une rue by Severine for Luxembourg 1971
#28: La Det Swinge by Bobbysocks! for Norway 1985
#27: Secret Garden by Nocturne for Norway 1995
#26: My Number One by Helena Paparizou for Greece 2005
#25: Satellite by Lena for Germany 2010
#24: Insieme: 1992 by Toto Cutogno for Italy 1990
#23: Save Your Kisses for Me by Brotherhood of Man for United Kingdom 1976
#22: 1944 by Jamala for Ukraine 2016
A song that's actually grown on me a lot, but I'm still annoyed it stole the title from Dami Im...
#21: Why Me? by Linda Martin for Ireland 1992
#20: Hallelujah by Milk & Honey for Israel 1979
#19: Making Your Mind Up by Bucks Fizz for United Kingdom 1981
#18: J'aime la vie by Sandra Kim for Belgium 1986
#17: Hold Me Now by Johnny Logan for Ireland 1987
#16: Poupee de cire, Poupee de son for Luxembourg 1965
#15: Running Scared by Ell & Nikki for Azerbaijan 2011
#14: Every Way That I Can by Sertab Erener for Turkey 2003
#13: Only Teardrops by Emmelie de Forest for Denmark 2013
#12: Arcade by Duncan Lawrence for Netherlands 2019
#11: Take Me To Your Heaven by Charlotte Nilsson for Sweden 1999
Into the top 10 of my favourite Eurovision winners of all time, that I haven't really given an awful lot of thought to but I was bored on a Sunday evening because of lockdown...
#Joint 10th: Wild Dances by Ruslana for Ukraine 2004
Not wanting to put either outside the Top 10, I've gone all 1969 and included two!
I saw Ruslana live in Lisbon in 2018 and she was absolutely superb...
#Joint 10th: Fairytale by Alexander Rybak for Norway 2009
This is a brilliant and original song and would have been higher but for an awful performance in the grand final in Moscow...
#9: Diva by Dana International for Israel 1998
An iconic moment in the history of Eurovision... Many people's favourite of all time!
#8: Diggi-Loo Diggi-Ley by The Herreys for Sweden 1984
My ultimate guilty pleasure song...
#7: Ne Partez pas sans moi by Celine Dion for Switzerland 1988
I will always believe that Celine Dion has the best voice in world music of all time. Sends shivers down my spine whenever I listen to her...
#6: Fly on the Wings of Love by The Olsen Brothers for Denmark 2000
It took me a long time to actually realise this was a Eurovision song (as 2000 was a bit before my time!) and actually first heard this thanks to a dance cover by an obscure band called XTM.
#5: Heroes by Mans Zelmerlow for Sweden 2015
Genuinely could have this top 5 in any order given how much I like them and Mans gave me a hug at the London Eurovision Party in 2015 so he gains a place for that.
#4: What's Another Year? by Johnny Logan for Ireland 1980
Literally have not stopped listening to this for the entirety of today, which may mean it's higher than I meant it to be, but the iconic Mr Eurovision's first Eurovision win is beautiful.
#3: Molitva by Marija Serifovic for Serbia 2007
Truly, truly beautiful and again, reprised so amazingly from Marija in the backdrop of empty Serbian streets last night. Have always loved this song and will continue to do so.
#2: Euphoria by Loreen for Sweden 2012
Many people's favourite, especially from my generation, this performance was an absolute stand out.
#1: Rise Like a Phoenix by Conchita Wurst for Austria 2014
For sheer power, for the staging, for the dress and for the impact it made, this will always be my favourite Eurovision entry and will take some beating. The reverberations it sent around Europe were monumental, plus she's so down to Earth and lovely to boot. A deserved Number One!
...
So there we are. Given a week or so where I thought this through properly, the order may be different but roughly, there are my Eurovision winners ranked bottom to top!
See you in Rotterdam in 2021, where (fingers crossed) everything is back to normal!
#45: Apres toi by Vicky Leandros for Luxembourg 1972
#44: Dansevise by Grethe and Jorgann Ingmann for Denmark 1963
#43: Refrain by Lys Assia for Switzerland 1956
Sorry...
#42: Love Shine A Light by Katrina and the Waves for United Kingdom 1997
Sorry again...
#41: Een Beetje by Teddy Scholten for Netherlands 1959
#40: Ding-a-Dong by Teach-In for Netherlands 1975
#39: In Your Eyes by Niamh Kavanagh for Ireland 1993
#38: Un Premier Amour by Isabelle Aubret for France 1962
#37: La La La by Massiel for Spain 1968
Catchy? Yes. Completely unimaginative and undeserving of a Eurovision title? Also yes.
#36: Tu te Reconnaitras by Anne-Marie David for Luxembourg 1973
#35: Merci, Cherie by Udo Jurgens for Austria 1966
#34: Rock and Roll Kids by Paul Harrington and Charlie McGettigan for Ireland 1994
#33: I Wanna by Marie N for Latvia 2002
#32: Toy by Netta for Israel 2018
#31: All Kinds of Everything by Dana for Ireland 1970
#30: Waterloo by ABBA for Sweden 1974
Now, this was voted as the UK's favourite ever Eurovision entry of all time last night, but ever since I was forced to sit through a 4 hour show of a tribute band at the Princess Theatre in Torquay in 2004, I have always had bad flashbacks whenever an ABBA song appears... So... Sorry. Not sorry.
Only as high as 30 because it's a staple of the Eurovision Song Contest...
#29 Un banc, Un arbre, Une rue by Severine for Luxembourg 1971
#28: La Det Swinge by Bobbysocks! for Norway 1985
#27: Secret Garden by Nocturne for Norway 1995
#26: My Number One by Helena Paparizou for Greece 2005
#25: Satellite by Lena for Germany 2010
#24: Insieme: 1992 by Toto Cutogno for Italy 1990
#23: Save Your Kisses for Me by Brotherhood of Man for United Kingdom 1976
A song that's actually grown on me a lot, but I'm still annoyed it stole the title from Dami Im...
#21: Why Me? by Linda Martin for Ireland 1992
#20: Hallelujah by Milk & Honey for Israel 1979
#19: Making Your Mind Up by Bucks Fizz for United Kingdom 1981
#18: J'aime la vie by Sandra Kim for Belgium 1986
#17: Hold Me Now by Johnny Logan for Ireland 1987
#16: Poupee de cire, Poupee de son for Luxembourg 1965
#15: Running Scared by Ell & Nikki for Azerbaijan 2011
#14: Every Way That I Can by Sertab Erener for Turkey 2003
#13: Only Teardrops by Emmelie de Forest for Denmark 2013
#12: Arcade by Duncan Lawrence for Netherlands 2019
#11: Take Me To Your Heaven by Charlotte Nilsson for Sweden 1999
Into the top 10 of my favourite Eurovision winners of all time, that I haven't really given an awful lot of thought to but I was bored on a Sunday evening because of lockdown...
#Joint 10th: Wild Dances by Ruslana for Ukraine 2004
Not wanting to put either outside the Top 10, I've gone all 1969 and included two!
I saw Ruslana live in Lisbon in 2018 and she was absolutely superb...
#Joint 10th: Fairytale by Alexander Rybak for Norway 2009
This is a brilliant and original song and would have been higher but for an awful performance in the grand final in Moscow...
#9: Diva by Dana International for Israel 1998
An iconic moment in the history of Eurovision... Many people's favourite of all time!
#8: Diggi-Loo Diggi-Ley by The Herreys for Sweden 1984
My ultimate guilty pleasure song...
#7: Ne Partez pas sans moi by Celine Dion for Switzerland 1988
I will always believe that Celine Dion has the best voice in world music of all time. Sends shivers down my spine whenever I listen to her...
#6: Fly on the Wings of Love by The Olsen Brothers for Denmark 2000
It took me a long time to actually realise this was a Eurovision song (as 2000 was a bit before my time!) and actually first heard this thanks to a dance cover by an obscure band called XTM.
#5: Heroes by Mans Zelmerlow for Sweden 2015
Genuinely could have this top 5 in any order given how much I like them and Mans gave me a hug at the London Eurovision Party in 2015 so he gains a place for that.
#4: What's Another Year? by Johnny Logan for Ireland 1980
Literally have not stopped listening to this for the entirety of today, which may mean it's higher than I meant it to be, but the iconic Mr Eurovision's first Eurovision win is beautiful.
#3: Molitva by Marija Serifovic for Serbia 2007
Truly, truly beautiful and again, reprised so amazingly from Marija in the backdrop of empty Serbian streets last night. Have always loved this song and will continue to do so.
#2: Euphoria by Loreen for Sweden 2012
Many people's favourite, especially from my generation, this performance was an absolute stand out.
#1: Rise Like a Phoenix by Conchita Wurst for Austria 2014
For sheer power, for the staging, for the dress and for the impact it made, this will always be my favourite Eurovision entry and will take some beating. The reverberations it sent around Europe were monumental, plus she's so down to Earth and lovely to boot. A deserved Number One!
...
So there we are. Given a week or so where I thought this through properly, the order may be different but roughly, there are my Eurovision winners ranked bottom to top!
See you in Rotterdam in 2021, where (fingers crossed) everything is back to normal!
