Sunday 26 September 2010

The Adventures of Simeon and Ken

Ok, I'm back. I have to admit, I have missed this after a monumental amount of time .. Sort of.

Still, business as usual. Saturday night means only one thing these days. Partying, drinking and maybe a little bit o' lovin'? (Ok, I won't ever say that again), but no. Work is the only thing on the agenda at this time of night and I have to say, this evening was one of the strange ones.

It was quiet. Not quiet quiet but certainly quiet, for a Saturday night. I thought it would be mayhem seeing as the university students are back in full flow and they'd be all over their first Saturday night like a swarm of bees over my ears when I was 6 years old. Ouch, that hurt. But, it wasn't.

I wasn't in the best of moods at the start of the night. Usually, I wake up at about 9:15 and it takes me forever to wake up properly so I start the shift in a bad mood, but it wasn't the case today. I woke up a few hours early but still left the house in a bad mood. Bad times. My mood wasn't improved by the ever-existing Wall, and even the departure of the Store Manager for the last time, (he's now left), couldn't improve a darkening mood. I feared a long night ahead.

However, a special mention to certain people for improving my mood. 3 different people in fact. I only know one of them. Daniel Beddoe. Probably drunk, I texted him of my troubles of running into the wall this evening. He texted back this reply:

"I'll be there in 5, see if I can f****** self-destruct down that piece of Wall. Tell him, from me, he looks like twat tonight, and his baby is going to grow up as a whore!"

Sorry, I know it's wrong. As I'm sure does Beddoe, but it made me literally laugh out loud. In the middle of the store. That made me look a tad strange, but it kept me smiling the whole night! Truly epic!

The other episode was a little stranger. In the deep depths of the night, probably 4am, two guys dressed in only a tea-towel, you did read that correctly, ran in and started "presenting" a TV show. They called it 'The Adventures of Simeon and Ken' and I have to admit it was a good as entertainment you can get whilst not watching some dumbo in the auditions of the X Factor. They acted out a sort of soap-opera scene which ended up in Ken being stabbed and then sang a fairly dreadful duet of Britney Spears 'Hit Me One More Time' before sprinting out again. I was amazed and I'm glad to say The Wall missed every second of it. He was hibernating somewhere in the outer regions of a blocked toilet.

Despite these two acts of greatness, I still left the store in a bad mood. I found out I have been given extra hours in a couple of weeks that I don't want and wasn't asked about and for some reason, I was incensed about it. The manager in the morning said, "Ask Alex", trying to fend me off so he could enjoy a fag and a coffee. I hope that gets sorted out sooner rather than later.

As for me, there is no football this morning due to our team getting a 'Bye' in the first round of the League Cup. Through to Round 2 we go, but I would have preferred a match I think. And I always though a 'Bye', was a strange word to use. It suggests we're saying goodbye to the competition! Maybe a 'Carry on, Walk Straight Through' would be more appropriate? Yeah, maybe not.

I'm not in the greatest of moods still. Someone suggested I had S.A.D, (Seasonal Affective Disorder), which occurs during the months of September to April, but surely everyone has 'S.A.D'? Everyone feels more down when the days are shorter and it's cold, wet and miserable in contrast to Sun and daylight. So I'm not convinced about that. Better than the other guy that said I used my depression "as an excuse to shirk the responsibility of life". It goes without saying, I no longer speak to him. A disappointing diagnosis there.

I think I need another pay day. And a flat of my own. Definitely a flat of my own. I'm fed up of looking at the same four, blue walls of my bedroom at the back of the house.

Cya x

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